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No wire no wire no wire
Wednesday, August 4, 2010 at 12:44AM 
Have you ever courted disaster, then been dismayed when calamity responded eagerly to your advances?
I have.
Like, the time I was climbing down the pool ladder while talking on my cell phone.
The phone drowned.
(I was due for an upgrade anyway.)
Or the time I drove -- a car -- before I even had a driver's license.
I got about three blocks before I was stopped.
(That was a very long time ago.)
I Have A Deadline ... And A Beverage
Then there was the time I set a full cup of hot coffee right beside my keyboard on a heavy transcript-typing day.
Wait for it!
Copious amounts of the coffee sloshed into my keyboard, instantly wreaking alphanumerical havoc therein.
(Which resulted in me forcefully destroying my keyboard a few hours later. I took it back to the store in pieces. They were most qwertyous and gave me a new one for the price of a maintenance contract! I do believe they noticed the wild look in my eyes and were aching to be rid of me.)
That keyboard was never right anyway. The "E" was gone! What n rv .
Houston, We Have A Problem
In a similar vein, today when I visited the lovely blog of Mari at My Little Corner of the World and saw her Bob's clever carving Shocking, I was reminded of something that happened a few days after we moved to South Carolina.
The cable guy had come out to hook us up and found he was obliged to do some work in my sunroom involving a jigsaw and the drywall.
As he knelt facing the wall, back to the room, tool belt tugging on his trouser waistband -- as they do -- and made use of the jigsaw, the cable guy began intoning what sounded like a solemn mantra.
No war no war no war no war ...
TG and I stood transfixed. Then we looked at one another and burst out laughing.
"What are you saying, man?" TG finally asked.
Some People Have All The Luck
Cable guy looked up with a silly grin. "I say 'no war no war no war' over 'n over agin when I'm makin' a hole in the wall and I ain't turnt the juice off nor know where the wars even is."
TG and I looked at one another again.
Nothing.
Then dawn broke.
OH! He's saying no WIRE, no WIRE, no WIRE! As in, I hope there's no live electrical wire here where I'm cutting into the wall in order to install cable!
To this day when TG and I are taking some inordinate risk ... as in, assuming there's enough orange and lime sherbet at home in the freezer instead of automatically buying more ... we both chant "no war no war no war" just loud enough so the other can hear and be comforted.
Elections Have Consequences
Thirteen weeks remain until November second ... the day we could turn it all around if we all turn out.
Plan now to vote early and vote wisely.
It won't be enough to sit around chanting no more no more no more no more -- no more.
Have you seen the pictures of muslims clogging major thoroughfares in Manhattan, blocking traffic for hours so they can mutter prayers to Allah?
According to Snopes dot com, this has been happening for many years on an annual -- not weekly -- basis, and has nothing to do with Barack Obama being president.
I don't care.
Imagine if a group of Christians attempted to block traffic on a street in any city on any day, falling to their knees to pray to God, refusing to move until they were good and ready.
I'm pretty sure arrests would be made, and it would be covered with great contemptuous relish by the likes of Rachel Maddow and Keith Olbermann, not to mention the females on The View.
Freedom of religion is one thing; Death to America is quite another.
We've really got to change things this time or, practically speaking, there'll be no hope.
Reader Comments (6)
I hate that split second between when you thought you were going to get away with it and seeing the imminent disaster. I actually do it quite often. Mostly I get away with it. Sometimes not.
We're doing our part in Oregon. We fight the liberal influence in Portland, which has the numbers to defeat us usually, but maybe this year it will be different.
"No war"! That's a good one! I love that you two still reference it.
I hadn't heard about the prayers on the street in Manhattan. It makes me angry but doesn't surprise me.I heard yesterday that the way is clear for a mosque at Ground Zero. It's Political Correctness gone overboard with no common sense in sight.
Come November I will certainly be voting!
Courting disaster, then being dismayed when calamity eagerly responds to your advances, nicely describes the situations of Americans who voted for Obama in '08. Or at least it should, if they have any decency or common sense!
I'm bad about clipping my cellphone in it's case onto my jeans when I'm working in the yard, in case I do something stupid and need to call someone, ha. More than once I have come inside when finished, gone to the bathroom, and .... yes, the cellphone fell into the commode. Had to get a new one. I never forget to remove it now.
Sue, ain't it the truth? That horrible moment when you know in all likelihood your goose is cooked.
Kev, truer words were never spoken. Vote in haste, repent at leisure!
Debbie, that's awful. And certainly no fun for the cell phone ... LOLOL
ROFL! Yesterday, I was literally rolling on the floor but NOT laughing. I had a "no war" moment and it involved a "war" too! At the end of my workday, I bent over in my roller chair to unplug my electrical plug from the wall. My roller chair has no arms and the wood floor is slicker than snot. You KNOW where this is going, don't you? Yes, the chair did a skid and I fell on my keester, almost pulling the desk down with me. I am sore as the dickens today. Poor hubby had to help me up. Now that I have had knee replacement, I dread falls like the plague because it is impossible to get up. You can't kneel on the replacement knee at all. I don't know how I would have ever gotten up without his help. Geez, now I am going to be one of those old ladies that needs at 24-hour monitor!