I said okay but he went away

So let's see. What was the last semi-interesting thing that happened to me.

Oh yes. Along with recent Dagny photos featuring the kitchen Christmas tree, here's a tale which, appropriately, involves food.

I was at the grocery store, on my tippy toes in the aisle that contains juice products, reaching high and far back for a bottle of lemon juice. This was a few weeks before Thanksgiving.

As my fingertips began prodding at the only bottle I could remotely reach without a ladder and began urging it towards the shelf edge being careful to avoid knocking the bottle (or bottles) off onto my head, I heard a voice behind me.

Uh, ma'am? Male voice.

Oh good, I thought. A tall man has materialized behind me, has intuited that I am having difficulty, and is about to offer to reach the lemon juice for me.

But no.

It was a man. I got that part right.

A tall man who I would describe as being in his mid sixties. Dressed in dark slacks and a collared shirt that appeared soiled in the front.

Like me, he had commandeered a grocery cart. In the front part (where you'd park a baby or small child), he had placed four Marie Callender frozen dinners.

They looked for all the world like props. 

After securing my attention, the man proceeded to stumble through a speech about having recently undergone surgery and being in possession of an EBT card with a zero balance.

I waited until I could get a word in and then I said: Sir, if you need food I'll be glad to buy you those things. I gestured toward the frozen dinners.

Kindly don't peg me as a bleeding heart or a good Samaritan. It's not that warm and fuzzy. I just didn't know what else to do.

See, while I'm neither of the things mentioned above, I am a skeptic. And I was skeptical indeed as to whether I was being asked to feed a hungry person, or whether what the stranger really wanted was cash.

I don't carry cash, so there's that.

And on the off chance he really was hungry, I was willing to spend a few dollars to alleviate that. 

But I had a shopping list of stuff to buy to feed my own family, and I was maybe halfway through. 

I told the stranger I wasn't done and that he'd have to either wait for me up front, or follow me around until I was finished.

He said he'd follow me around.

And he did, until about ninety seconds later when the fact that he was following me (closely), got on my nerves.

I turned around and asked if, instead of frozen dinners, he wouldn't like some real food -- like, fruits and vegetables?

He said he was a bachelor and didn't know how to cook anything.

I asked whether there were places he could go to obtain free meals or food -- such as a food bank or a mission or a church -- to spare him the embarrassment of panhandling in the grocery store.

He said a pastor had helped him a little but he wasn't aware of anyplace else that he could go.

So I asked if he'd mind giving me some space in which to finish my shopping, and then I'd meet him up front.

My new acquaintance went away. As I pushed my buggy up and down aisles, I saw him from a distance a time or two, keeping an eye on me.

When I eventually made my way to the checkout lines, I began looking for him.

He'd vanished. Throughout the process of unloading my stuff onto the conveyor belt, I continued to look around.

Then I saw him. The man who had asked me to buy four frozen dinners was striding purposefully out of the store. His hands were empty.

Years ago I wrote about a man who accosted TG at a filling station, begging for food. My TG will always buy food for someone who asks; that's one of the reasons I agreed to buy the Marie Callenders for my stranger.

But see, they don't want food. They want money. And not money for food. Sorry but that's life on the mean streets.

Way back when, I was accused by a reader of being insensitive to the needs of the unfortunate. She reminded me that for all I knew, the beggars are former stockbrokers whose families have died in car crashes, or who have fallen on hard times in any number of garish ways.

(For her it was always stockbrokers and dead families. I think she'd seen too many movies.)

I hope you haven't formed the impression that I turn a blind eye and heart to the plight of those who are truly needy.

If you need food, I will feed you. I've been known to feed people who didn't technically even require food; they just looked as though they could use something good.

I dispense free advice too, although I make every attempt not to meddle. I'll thank you not to snicker.

The point is, if I can help, I'm here.

At Christmastime and all the time. You can even ask me at the grocery store.

Believe me. 

And that is all for now.

=0=0=0=

Happy Monday :: Happy December

Comments

[Judy Miller]

On my first trip to Boston, I was throwing money at every panhandler I met--I felt so sorry for them. Then my friend said we should try a different approach. The next panhandler who came up and asked for money for food, my friend said, "Sure. There's a McDonald's right there. Let us take you to lunch." The guy cursed at us and walked away. They seem to want money, but it's not for food. I learned later that some of them make quite a good "salary" panhandling. I'm thinking I might try it--only I'd take the food!!!!!

[Mari]

Oh, I believe you! I know your heart and I know if I needed something you would certainly help! We've had someone standing in front of our local store asking for money for a few days. I hate seeing that because I would like to help, if I knew it was a true need, but far too often, (most of the time I think) it's a scam. Our local news did a story on actual people who were begging in the Grand Rapids area, and found they were making more money than many of us, tax free too. Several walked to nice cars when they left and drove to nice houses. It's sad because it takes away for people with real needs.
On another note - what has happened to Dagny? My word - that child s growing far too fast! She is just beautiful. Those eyes are gorgeous.

[Jennifer]

@Judy ... exactly. My husband always offers to take them to fast food and buy them the works. They never want it. My son-in-law is a pastor and every day, someone stops by or calls the church office seeking a handout. Recently he put a homeless family up in a nearby motel for the night. The next day he got a call from the management. The "homeless" family had stolen the room television. I wonder what you need with a TV if you're homeless. Oh wait. *sigh* xoxo

@Mari ... you're so right. Professional panhandlers do quite well. And Dagny? She is feeling two-and-a-half and getting lots of joy out of life. She's a treasure and I agree, a beauty too. We're all in her thrall. xoxo

[Donna (Texas)]

Goodness girl! You did good...wonder why he left though...oh well, what worried me was that he would have followed you into the parking lot!
Miss Dagny is such a dollbaby! I know you love her over the moon!
hughugs

[Jennifer]

@Donna ... I wouldn't have left the store if he were still following me after I bought him four TV dinners, haahahaa! Public places can be dangerous. Yep we are pretty crazy about the Dag. xoxo

[Barb]

I've learned from experience that handing money over to people I don't know is not good. A couple times we've been scammed and felt foolish afterward, but the stories are so believable! I do feel a deep gratitude for the goodness in my life (your last post) and give of myself and my resources (under certain conditions). You behaved admirably and charitably toward the man - not giving cash was a wise decision. I may have been looking over my shoulder a little in the parking lot! Dagny's expressions are so open - I can read her little mind. What a lovely little girl.

[Cheryl Arment]

I love Dagny's dark hair and sweet face! I bet she loves Christmas.

I had a young man get close to me in a store here in town. I was looking for something on the shelves and because of my poor eye sight, I was getting up close. He stood right beside me while talking on his cell phone. He said, "Grandmother, sweet grandmother, can you hear me? My daughter is sick and I need some money to get her some medicine." I quickly walked away and went to a different aisle. He came close to me again and went through the same script. When it happened the second time, I knew that something was up. I kept walking and stayed away.

One time a man approached Alan for money. Alan told him that he would take him to McDonalds and get him a meal. The man told him that he was a vegetarian. Hahahahaha! Needless to say, Alan didn't give him anything.

[Jennifer]

@Barb ... Amen to all you said and how perceptive you are! Dagny is WIDE open all the time. She loves life so much. She wrings all the joy and juice out of every experience. She's such a joy to be around, if a little exhausting simply because of the energy level. But a sweeter child you never met. She's our sunshine for sure. xoxo

@Cheryl ... That story made the hair stand up on my arms! How creepy! It's best to keep one's guard up while not becoming cynical, I suppose. YES Dagny loves Christmas! She "helps" with everything while shrieking "Make Christmas! Make Christmas!" Haahaha xoxo