There's More Than Corn In Indiana

Hoosier favorite movie star?

As anyone who has known me for more than ninety seconds is likely to be acutely aware, I have an irrational weakness for actor Johnny Depp. TG does not mind this as he is a Johnny fan too. I will thank you not to snicker! But seriously, here lately I've been keeping a sharp eye on the hubbub in the Midwest as Johnny has been rattling around in Illinois (my beloved Chicago!), Wisconsin, and Indiana since early March. In the rust belt for the filming of his latest movie, Public Enemies, based on Bryan Burrough's bestseller Public Enemies: America's Greatest Crime Wave and the Birth of the FBI, 1933-34, Johnny is portraying the folk-hero outlaw bank robber John Dillinger (1903-1934).

Think about it. If John Dillinger had been as pretty as Johnny Depp, a gun would have been superfluous really.

Time called the source material "ludicrously entertaining." I don't know about that as I haven't read the book yet, but what I consider ludicrous is the idea of John Christopher Depp, II, that certified paragon of pulchritude, undisputed icon of male beauty, playing a Depression-era serial criminal! Pictures have been circulating of the cutie-pie poised insouciantly on the running board of a vintage '30s coupe, dressed in a suit, overcoat, and fedora, brandishing a machine gun and sometimes a pillowcase full of loot. I find this hysterical. And of course I can't stop looking.

Think about it. If John Dillinger had been as pretty as Johnny Depp, a gun would have been superfluous really. For one thing, the first time he showed his face in town (pick a town ... any town) the female population of said burg would have dropped everything -- babies, groceries, dentures, tills -- and followed him around en masse like zombies. A bloodless coup, as it were. The girls would surely have protected him from all who would detain him, much less do him harm, up to and including the most zealous representatives of state and federal law enforcement agencies.

In this case Melvin Purvis and all his G-men would have been no match for the XX chromosome.

So once again Hollywood -- predictably -- opts for box office magic in lieu of more realistic type casting. Alert the media! I ran this observation by TG tonight. "Don't you think Johnny's too handsome to play John Dillinger?" I inquired. "Yeah," he replied. "You need a Humphrey Bogart type for that." Not my Johnny by a long shot, y'all. Bogie had a certain je ne sais quoi to be sure, but Johnny has both je ne sais quoi AND those cheekbones AND those eyes AND ... never mind. I think all John Dillinger had was a lot of nerve and nothing to lose except his own thieving homicidal hide.

Be that as it may, the cameras are rolling and to my great dismay (because he's there and I'm here on account of I have deadlines ... don't worry; it's not contagious), today Johnny was filming at the old jail in Crown Point, Indiana, that Dillinger grandiosely broke out of (using a fake gun to incarcerate the warden and more than a dozen officers in the process, then driving away in the sheriff's car) in 1934.

See, from 1974 until 1991 I lived in and around Crown Point. TG and I met and fell in love in Northwest Indiana and lived in "the region" for the first twelve years of our marriage. All four of our children were born there. It's not exactly Palm Beach but it has its charms. For one thing, if you like soot-blackened snow and bitter cold you'll love it there. For another, it's a stone's throw from the Illinois state line and with a fast getaway car you can be in downtown Chicago inside of forty minutes. LOTS to do in Chicago, y'all. TG and I want to retire there; one can only take so many of these South Carolina "winters."

When TG and I lived in Schererville, a scant ten miles from Crown Point, the old jail housed a restaurant named, appropriately, Dillinger's. We ate there a few times; they had great burgers and I was all about the exposed brick and '30s ambience. The courthouse, just a few steps away, had scads of adorable shops where I've whiled away many a contented afternoon. When each of our kids needed their first pair of hard-soled shoes I headed for the Hub Bootery on Main Street, where they sold Stride Rite and took the time to measure the tiny feet properly. My best friend Sara lived in Crown Point and we often met on the square for lunch.

So I figure Johnny's bound to have walked over some of my residual DNA in the streets of Crown Point by now ... a strand of hair, maybe, or a skin cell ... please don't tell me that's impossible! I'm sure if I had been able to go I would've distracted him from the job he has to do. I mean, try to imagine John Dillinger audaciously escaping from jail with a prostrate grandmother attached to his ankle ... it just wouldn't fit the story line. Even Bogie couldn't carry that off.

Comments

[Keli]

Ah, but if you'd gone, imagine the stuff you'd have had to write about right here! Besides, they could have fit you into the screenplay somehow as Dillinger's extremely young-looking and attractive mom attached to his ankle as he's trying to escape. Hollywood's all about taking artistic liberties with history.

[Jennifer]

LOL! Thanks ever so, darling! I myself would have donned a gorilla suit for a chance to play in a scene with Johnny Depp ... but not to worry; someday I'll write about meeting him! Hope I don't act like a stuper when I get my chance!